Where have we been

Caden Robert

I hadn't posted for months, didn't feel the need to I guess as the birth date grew closer I started concentrating on my baby, on my family, and now that he is here I feel at peace.


My world imploded and I picked up the pieces one shard at a time and with Caden's birth my world is complete again.

I am so happy so lucky to get up every morning and spend the day holding my pefect little baby and watch him all day long. I feel lucky that I have a wonderful husband a job that I love, a son who is amazing. I am the luckiest person in the whole world.

I'm not sure if I'll keep blogging or not I haven't decided if I have the time or anything worth reading to say and how much I want to put out in the world. I have made a resolution for 2012 to clean up my web profile to get ride of all the extra emails and profiles that I have laying around on the web.  If I do keep blogging about mommyhood it probably will be on a new blog, new baby new experience

Caden Robert

Our due date was Friday( October 14, 2011) and Saturday night my water broke 51 hours of labor later Caden was born.  October 18, 2011  8# 11 ounces 22 inches long and perfect.

We are so lucky to have him. Our plan (as always happens when you have one right) didn't go just how we thought it would. We ended up transferring to the hospital late Monday night and after a few hours of pushing and a little help from the vacuum Caden was born.  

Despite the issues we had last year with the hospital this experience was the opposite it was wonderful, the nurses where amazing and so helpful it was really nice and healing to have a good experience in a place that just over a year ago we had had such bad one.

We were feeling so lucky and just overwhelmed with the whole experience when just before we where discharged Rob happened to ask one of the nurses if she knew who the nurse was that had gone to a nursing conference in Montana last year.

Robs mom had meet and talked to a nurse about what had happened with our loss, and had felt really comforted by the fact that she was shocked at what had happened as we all where.

The nurse that Rob asked said yeah I was the only one to go to that. When Rob told her that she had talked to his mom and that we where the ones that it had happened to she was shocked. She said she had never won anything in a raffle before that night but at the conference she won a dozen roses and gave them to Robs mom because she was so impacted by the story.  She then went back to Moscow and talked to the hospital.

Now the policy has changed and ANY pregnant woman that comes in goes to the Birth Center and not the ER. It's great closer and gives me peace with our miscarriage.

Public Property

dressed up for Mutt Strut

I have reached the size that people feel that they can ask, comment, and offer advice on pregnancy, how miserable I must be and I'm sure how horrible child birth is going to be.  Two people commented yesterday at the supermarket, one was nice asking about how much the baby was kicking and saying that her baby kept the same awake hours after they where born. The other woman said that I must be enjoying the heat.

At mutt strutt the announcer said something about how Romey was going to be a big sister (another pet peeve hes a poodle but that doesn't make him a girl)

Lots of people have been asking boy or girl and apparently not finding out is a brave thing to do becuase that is what most of them say when I say that we aren't going to find out early. 

It is interesting watching how people interact with pregnancy

102 days left...

There are just 102 days left till our due date. Kinda crazy to think that it started at 280 days which means that I've been pregnant for 180 days or so. Other than being hot and tired and missing sleeping I am doing good. Baby is good and has been moving pretty consistently everyday for long stretches of time,


Baby seems to like kicking (petting?) Roxy when she gets up on my lap. Roxy isn't so into the whole thing she just sighs and looks at me like, isn't it enough that you are running out of lap room for me to sleep on and now I have to get kicked.

Its been a long week...

25 weeks

 So pictures of me at 25 weeks. I've had a few people ask if I was due soon (nope just a large German baby) I'm not measuring huge, I just look huge.
It was a crazy week with bee swarms, lots of kids, yelling and general chaos. I've got a bit of time off now to get sewing done, house cleaned, one of our apartments painted and cleaned, and all the little things that need to be done that haven't been done.

All in all things are going well, I'd love to get things together and not feel so behind  and I can't quite believe how close October is getting and how much needs to be done before this baby is done.

25 week bump

give up

Don't you just hate it when your whole life seems to be coming apart at the seams?
I keep saying I'm fine and things are fine and how good things are. Like if I say it enough it is going to be true. The baby is fine and perfect and the pregnancy is perfect, its just the whole rest of my life that feels like it's imploding.
I'm so sick of pretending like it is all wonderful and desperately trying to hold the little pieces of my life together, it's just so tiring though and just when I think I'm making a little tinny bit of headway something else falls apart. I feel like I'm failing. Even as I write this I know that more bad things are going to happen that the stress isn't going to let up. That my life is going to stay imploded and part of me feels like I a selfish person for even thinking about bringing a baby into this mess. There is a limit to the amount of stuff that one person can handle and I feel like we've gotten or limit. So can bad things stop happening can we just, please, have a little bit of good luck. It isn't one thing that is bad or not going the way that we wish it was, it feels like everything, even the little ones, is going badly. I just am done. I just give up. I just want it all  to go away.

Appointment Today

Today we are seeing the midwife and hearing the baby. Amazing thing to know that our baby is ok becuase they are kicking me as I  type this, there is no what if something happened irrationality that I usually have. I am so thankful for a baby that wiggles and kicks all the time it is a constant reassurance that they are in there and OK. The two little girls that I watch are going to come with us today to hear the baby. They are very excited about hearing the baby and getting to come and see what happens at a appointment.

The three year old met our midwife at the annual midwife picnic in May and she got hit in the face with a swing and split her lip. It wasn't a bad split but there was a lot of blood and Nancy, our midwife, got her ice and now is referred to as "the person that fixed L's lip"  It was just some ice and a few nice words but when you are three, it is a huge thing and has inspired this She can fix anything idea and she gets babies out of their mommies tummies super woman image of her in both the girls minds. (lets face it she is something of a super woman)

We have been busy

We have been working on selling stuff at the farmers market and getting ready for the baby. Both things have been taking up a lot of time. Here are a few pictures of what we have been up too.  We painted our bedroom and moved all the baby things into our room. We are currently 22 weeks pregnant and everything is going really well this time and we are excited getting ready for our new baby who is due in October.

Getting ready for painting and our new puppy

Baby's new space

organizing baby things

20 weeks baby bump

Almost Edible veggies

Almost Edible fruits

Farmers market. We have been selling our fruits and veggies as well as jewlery for a few weeks now at the local market and have been having a lot of fun. You can check out our website Roxy Roo website

overwelming

I have to say that I've been slacking in blogging about this baby. Part of it is that I am not so worried. We are having a baby in October. I'm feeling the baby every day, a lot. Yesterday Rob felt the baby kick which is very cool and a huge milestone.

According to my midwife you can better guess your due date based on when you feel the 1st big kick, I felt it on May 23 which would make our kick due date October 23 verse the October 13 due date based on last menstrual period. It will be interesting to see which one is closer.
 
I have been working really hard on my crafts and selling at the farmers market. It has been going well.
I have been overwhelmed with nesting, the need to clean the whole house and organizing everything. I have been working on figuring out what we still need for the baby. Researching cloth diapers alone has been daunting.

We are lucky to have been given a lot of baby things, we have a crib, changing table, lots of clothing, little baby odds and ends. We really only need to get a stroller, car-seat, diapers, baby carriers, a few nursing odds and ends, and  we'll be ready for the baby.

From this side of 20 weeks it is starting to feel like we are running out of time. Mostly becuase we are trying to find the majority of things second hand, searching craigs list and ebay for deals. I know that we still have a lot of time but it is exciting to be on this side of the half way mark.

Best pregnancy symptoms ever

I just want to say I feel lucky that the 2nd trimester has been amazing lately and I'm grateful that it is.
I love feeling the baby move, the little flips and butterflies, the wiggles and pressure. Yesterday Rob and I where laying in bed reading which seems to be baby's time to wiggle, and I got kicked harder than the little popcorn bubbles, it was a good flick, so cool.

I love nesting, I'm not sure that Rob is a huge fan of having me pulling everything out and going through it, but I do know that he likes the end result of clean house.

I love baby socks they are so tinny and the idea that we are going to have a little person who's feet fit in them is exciting.

I love showing, Love the baby bump and looking pregnant. I love picking out what to wear that is going to show off my new shape.

I love having energy. Not just to do things but to care about things, to not be so exhausted that I don't even have energy to be passionate about anything.

AND
I love that there are all theses things to love about pregnancy.

baby things

 Roxy testing out the baby sleeping sack. She really liked it even when I unzipped it she stayed in the sack pretty cute.

Unpacking all the baby things that we have and boy looking at it, it is a lot. Organizing it all into sizes packing up the stuff that is bigger and organizing all the little pieces. Nesting. An exciting part of pregnancy that I've never been at. A new thing and so I've pulled it all out and the whole house is being organized, there is a large pile of things that are going in our hall I've cleaned out over half our closets and just looking at the stuff that is sitting waiting to be done makes me twitch. I am lucky that Rob takes this nesting, pregnancy thing with his easy going calm. He knows that it is useless to argue with me and gets the boxes out and puts them back when I tell him too.  Just one of the many reasons that I love him an that he will be the most amazing father.   

Midwife

Yesterday we had our appointment with our Midwife. Baby is measuring well, and has a strong heartbeat of 150 bpm. Everything else was great. Happy, happy happy.  I only got in a little trouble for not having started taking alfalfa, which I was supposed to start last time, but I started taking it yesterday and if taking goat food pills is what is needed for a healthy baby then I will gladly take them.

We've been working on setting up the baby things and I have decided to have a Blessing way instead of a baby shower when we go back to Portland in July. (I'll post more on what a blessing way is and how we are planning on doing it tomorrow)

The sun is out. Rob is making an omelet with fresh free range local chicken eggs, which always taste better than the store bought kind, and we got them for free (perks of knowing actually knowing the chickens) which makes them taste even better.

I have all sorts of plans for sewing fruits today, watermelons, oranges, pears, and apples.
I just feel happy and like today is going to be a good day.

Big steps and a lot of pictures

 Here I am, at 18 weeks. I'm showing people have been stopping me sharing advice. Best so far is don't carry a newborn around on a pillow, they don't brake. All in all I'm feeling pretty good. Baby has been moving around off and on mostly I  think its been happening more than I notice most of the time Rob saying I sway and rub my bump a lot.

 I've been working hard on selling stuff at the farmers market exciting and its been going well. Which is has been going good. I'm learning a lot about what I need to do to make my booth even better each week.

We did a lot of work in the house today. Our bedrooms started out looking like this and it need to get repainted and things needed to be moved around to fit all the baby stuff in it. We managed to get the room painted, install an new light and outlet plugs AND get our bed, dresser, crib, and a changing table in the room which was amazing. I still need to decorate and get things just right but I'm happy with how its looking so far.

BEFORE

BEFORE

Our before is a bit of a mess, the room is really small its only about a 10x10 with a tiny closet and you have to walk through our bedroom to get to the bathroom.

old light

new light re painted walls

Help from Rome

More help from Romey

Baby's things its a tight fit but its going to work.

So now I need to get the art work back up, sew new curtains, put the AC in the window, and our bedroom will be basiclly ready for Baby. The crib needs to be sanded down and painted, we set it up as it only has three real sides and we want to train the dogs that they can't go in it. Thus the brightly colored mobile I'm not a huge fan of it, it spins around and plays music, Roxy hates it so it is serving as a way to scare her from sleeping in the crib. Later on we will take it down but hopefully it will bother Roxy enough that she decided that the crib isn't for her and Romey usually does what Roxy does so we will see how it works

KICK!

Yesterday baby was active. I've been feeling the baby, not so much move but the pressure and area where I feel the pressure changes, once in a while I feel flutters.
Last night I was laying on the couch and felt some pretty good flutters that where consistent, in the same place. Honesty didn't think Rob would feel anything but I called him over and told him to try. With out me telling him where to put his hand or when I felt the flutters. He found the spot and then asked if that was it.
Way cool.

17 weeks

Still having trouble realizing that I made it this far. 
I talked to a few people about getting baby things from them and I've had people I don't know ask when I am due. Its crazy and exciting and I think that it might take me a while to wrap my head around this whole thing.

More pregnant than ever

Today I am more pregnant that I have ever been. Crazy exciting.
I don't even have words for the excitement and apprehension that I feel.
New uncharted territory.
No longer able to compare last time to this time.
Last time my baby was dead by now this time my baby is still alive.

Play

I am anti plastic in kids toys. All theses brightly colored light up sound toys, seem to kill the imagination of kids.
We are not going to have that stuff. My goal to the toys that come into our house is 90% have to be non plastic 100% non-battery.  Yesterday I found an amazing deal a play kitchen that is wooden and pink and retro fantastic. I was so excited and it was ten dollars.Exciting.

Fabric

I love going to the thrift stores and looking the the fabric. I found theses cool patterns for a dollar.  I'm not sure what I am going to do with them  but they are interesting.

New year New plan

We are always working toward a better life. A big part of  that is reducing the trash that our household makes, and reducing our impact on the world. We where both brought up in frugal reused, recycle types of households. My goal in our house is  to not  use toxic stuff, on our bodies, in our house, or our yard.

We have gotten rid of paper towels replacing them with micro fiber towels,
we don't have paper napkins, we use cloth
we buy mostly in bulk, and make food from scratch
we use vinger and baking soda for most of our house hold cleaning.
We make our own laundry soap.
We buy 98% of out stuff second hand.
We are trying to be more local/homemade
We don't eat stuff that is not real. (HFCS, other chemicals)
We are fazing out store bought lotions, soaps, ect for natural alternatives,
Come spring we will start our compost bin again (it sadly failed in the fall and needs some work so that it is not a doggie all you can eat bar.)
We are planning a good sized garden, planning on joining a CSA.
Thinking about getting some chickens.
we have reusable coffee cups,
homemade not store bought
planning on canning food and making beer
planning on biking more maybe making a no drive day.


when i write out what we do a and plan on doing it makes me realize one how much we do, and to how much we can still do.

Soap

On our quest to make our home less toxic and in the spirit of diy, we have embarked on making shampoo.
The  other day I made a yummy body scrub out of coffee grounds, and  today we ran out of shampoo. After reading Skin Deep and how toxic the stuff that we are putting on our bodies, I vowed to make over our shower. We are going green, and that means that we are making shampoo.  I read a lot about making shampoo.
What we ended up doing, and we will see how well it works it using  Castile soap, made out of olive oil it should be good!  All  the reviews are  pretty good online so here we go.
After trying it for two weeks we gave up on the homemade shampoo it is horrible,  We tried a few different combinations of  Castile soap, olive oil, mixing it with other shampoo nothing worked so we've broken down and have switched to another type of shampoo that is organic and much better than the other stuff that we had been using.
We may try again the Castile soap smells good and makes a nice body wash but as shampoo it just made our hair dry,oily. 

Remodeling ~ Bathroom

Before

After

           

We spent the 1st day of the new year painting our bathroom and the second day hanging bead board. We worth it though, I think.  Our bath room is tiny and a looked a little depressing so we decided that the first project of 2011 would be to give it a face lift.  When we bought the house it had really ugly wall paper that we pulled off an painted the walls white. It was a little boring and so we decided to freshen up the little space with wainscoting, and chair molding. A classic, look that fit the style of  our house. We painted three of the walls a very pale yellow green and the wall with the sink a dark gray the end result is fantastic. With the bead board and little updates it looks much more fitting in our old house.